Outtakes from Hints of Me
by 22blue
Summary: Just as the title says - nothing but outtakes. I'll add outtakes, mostly from Edward's POV, as I write them. Enjoy! Rated M
1. Chapter 1

**Happy Reader Appreciation Day! This is the outtake from Chapter 7 from Edward's POV. The conversation between Jake and Edward. This was also my submission for MsKathy's Haiti compilation, so a few of you may have already read this.**

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"Mmm hmm - one pastitcio, an Althena Plaka combo, lamb kapama, Salad Caprese – wait, make that two, and two tzatziki with pita bread, and can you throw in a couple of desserts?" It seemed kind of stupid to order so much food – I knew she wouldn't want to eat, but I had to try. I practically had to force her to eat a banana this morning.

Bella's eyes looked haunted when she left for the hospital, and I wanted to be with her, but it wasn't my place. This was her family, a part of her world where I didn't belong. I would stay with her though. I'd stay with Bella for as long as she needed me… and not just because I needed her.

Alice said it was a dangerous game I was playing, and I was setting myself - and Bella – up for a big fall. Alice didn't understand. Bella had given me more than just a quick lay - she wasn't just the temporary distraction I had desired over the past few years. I knew it the moment I saw her again at the hotel.

The time I spent in Hawaii away from her had been torture. I thought about her every day, but especially every night. I needed to touch her supple skin and have the curves of her body close to mine. I needed to be inside her, to feel her warmth around me and have her tongue in my mouth. I needed to breathe her in.

What would she say if she knew? I wouldn't be able to bear her reaction. This was a part of my life where she didn't belong.

The morning prior I waited on the porch steps for Bella to arrive at my house, feeling both anxious to see her and worried she might think I was moving things along too quickly. The armoire was simply something I wanted her to have, and admittedly, if she didn't freak out about it and ask me to send it back, it would be a reminder of her during the time we weren't together.

When I heard the gravel crunch under the tires of her car as she drove down the driveway, my heart beat a little faster, and when she parked and climbed out of her car I had to force myself not to run to her. I wanted laugh at her sarcasm and to hear her call me 'Cullen,' but the overwhelming urge to touch her was unbearable.

My instincts and need took over, and I picked her up, her legs wrapping tightly around my waist, and she seemed as eager to see me as I was to see her, making the short moments until I would be inside her feel that much longer. My dick throbbed, pushing against my jeans almost painfully, while I sucked her plump bottom lip and tasted the sweetness of her tongue.

I couldn't get her into the house fast enough - any patience to climb the stairs and take her to my bed left me the moment I saw her. My knees shook; they actually trembled seeing her bare breasts and hard nipples after she tore off her shirt and bra. I loved the way goose bumps spread across her creamy skin when I sucked her nipples, and I loved the way her body arched against mine.

Finally, I was inside her. She was so fucking warm and wet. She always was; god, she felt good. I missed her. The way she moved her hips with mine and pulled my hair drove me insane. The sounds she made as she came were almost melodic. Her quivering legs and muscles tightening and clenching around my cock when she peaked was nothing less than pure ecstasy.

Sometimes I thought she was put on this earth just for me, or maybe it was just dumb luck. Either way I wasn't going to let her go.

I smiled to myself, thinking about being with her, happy the armoire and bracelet didn't send her running, as I unpacked the few bottles of wine I picked up that afternoon. The wine I knew she liked.

I didn't know what complications she had going on in her life for her to also not want a traditional 'get to know you' type of relationship, but now this thing with her mother – she didn't deserve this too.

As I was opening cabinets and drawers in her kitchen to find wine glasses and a corkscrew, there was a knock at the door. Bella called just a short while ago and wasn't due home for another half an hour or so, not that she would have knocked on her own door, but maybe Emmett had driven like a bat out of hell and she forgot her house key.

Emmett seemed like a nice guy. He struck me as the kind of brother that would kick anyone's ass who might hurt his little sister, which was good because Bella was too good of a person and wasn't deserving of any pain caused by anyone – me included. I promised her things would always be good between the two of us, and I meant it.

I drew in a deep breath, preparing myself for whatever state she might be in as I opened the door.

Judging by the guy's expression, he was as shocked to see me as I was to see him.

"Is Bella home?" he asked. His hands were shoved in his pockets.

"No, she's not. Can I help you with something?"

He glanced toward her car and then back at me, eyeing me suspiciously. "Who are you?"

"Edward… I'm a friend of Bella's. You are?" Obviously, he wasn't family because he would have been at the hospital with her, or at the very least he would have known where she was.

"Jake. I'm Bella's hus-… ex-husband. I heard about her mom and wanted to check on her."

_Ex-husband?_

It didn't surprise me she'd had a serious relationship prior to the two of us meeting, but I never really thought about her being _that_ committed to anyone else.

I hoped _he_ wasn't the complication in her life – that she still had feelings for him. Nausea rolled through my stomach at the thought.

"She's still at the hospital. I'll tell her you stopped by." I had a tight grip on the door, waiting for him to walk away.

"Any idea how long she'll be?" he asked and pulled a cell phone from his pocket, glancing at the screen.

Part of me wanted to lie and tell the ex I had no idea, but I didn't. "Fifteen, twenty minutes, I guess."

"Mind if I wait?" He raised his eyebrows and squared his shoulders. It was as if he was challenging me. _Fucking tool._

"If you don't think Bella would mind, I suppose it wouldn't be a problem," I snickered. "She really needs all the positive support she can get right now." Jake brushed by me and sat a little too comfortably on her couch. I didn't like it. I sat in a chair across from him.

Would she mind? I had no idea – I didn't even know about this guy. Maybe she would be happy to see him, but selfishly I hoped she wouldn't.

"So, Edward, is it?" I nodded. _Jackass_. "How do you know Bella?"

"We've been seeing each other for a couple of months now." I leaned back in the chair, resting my ankle over my knee.

"Really? She never mentioned you."

_No shit, asshole._

"She never mentioned you either, Jake." The tool rolled his eyes. I expected him to stand at any moment and piss on her furniture, marking his territory.

"Yeah, well… Bella and I go way back."

And here we go. I wasn't going to give him the satisfaction of playing his game of one-upping the other.

"Great."

"Since high school." The possessive bastard wasn't going to relent.

"Then I'm sure you can understand how upset she might be when she walks through that door," I warned.

"That's why I'm here, man." He rested his elbow on the back of the couch, drumming his fingers on the cushion.

I was sure he had good intentions, but he seemed a little thick-headed and could probably use a little help shelving his need to claim Bella.

"I'm sure she'll appreciate your concern, Jake, but she's been a wreck over the past twenty-four hours – trust me, I've been with her the entire time. I'd suggest when she does come home," I looked at my watch and leaned forward, "which should be anytime now, you don't act like an ass just because I'm here."

"Excuse me?" He moved to the edge of the couch, and all I wanted to do was take him out back and break his jaw. "You don't know anything about me. I've loved Bella since the first time I saw her, and there's nothing in this world I wouldn't do for her. I was with her a hell of a lot longer than you've been. Things might not have worked out between us, but we're still _very_ good friends."

I wondered if they were really such good friends, why he was just showing up now.

"I know Bella. She's a good person," he continued, "she's the kind of person that needs help along the way."

What the hell did that mean?

"Help along what way?" My brow creased – he was beginning to give me a headache.

"You know, decisions, things like that."

"You're talking in circles, Jake."

"Look, I know Bella better than anyone, and she doesn't always know what's best for her, so she's going to need help going through this thing with her mom. I'll be here to help her."

"How long were you two married?" I asked. He clearly didn't know Bella, and now I wanted to break his entire face.

"About ten years." He shrugged. "What does that have to do with anything?"

"Because the woman you just described is not the same one I know and care about. She's witty, not afraid to try things, and she's brave. She's an intelligent woman, Jake. Give her a little credit."

Both of us turned toward the door at the sound of car doors being slammed shut.

He pissed me off, and I couldn't help but stoop to his level. I looked at him directly in the eye, and in a calm voice I clarified my intentions. "I don't give a fuck how long the two of you were together. I'm with her now, and I'll help her through this. If she does want you around, fine - I'll support whatever she needs, but do not upset her. Are we clear?"

"Fuck you, Edward."

Bella walked through the door; Emmett followed behind her. She looked worn out, but her eyes were wide as she glanced between Jake and me. I watched her closely as Jake darted over to her and hugged her.

The overprotective brother in Emmett was apparent as he peered at me, then Jake.

The grimace on her face told me everything I wanted to know as she squirmed out of his arms, and I took my rightful place behind her after shaking Emmett's hand.

And when she took hold of my hand as she told Jake she didn't need anything from him, I knew she was mine.


	2. Edward in Hawaii from ch 5

**A/N: I have to keep saying this – I don't own Twilight.**

**This is an outtake from the beginning of chapter 5 when Edward was in Hawaii. I have a feeling it probably won't completely satisfy your curiosities, but we don't want to spoil anything, do we? It's in Edward's POV, and keep in mind that all of this happened early on in Bella and Edward's relationship.**

**I have to send a HUGE thank you to JayNahNah who has volunteered to help with all things Hawaiian. She's helping me with authentication of dialogue and dialect, and there's no way I could pull it off without her. Translations will be in the ending a/n. **

**Also, thank you to askthemagic8ball, mac214, and sncmom for beta'ing. Smooch!**

*****

I spun the neon orange Nerf football between my fingers end over end as I sat on the beach in Wailuku. It was mid-afternoon and quiet – it was peaceful. A couple of surfers sat on their boards several yards out, apparently talking to one another while they waited for a wave to carry them back to shore. The ocean was calm; the surfers weren't going to get much action today.

I had wanted Bella to stay with me one more night, but she'd said she couldn't. Our weekend had gone by too fast – our time together always seemed to fly by; it was never enough. I had this reoccurring fantasy of whisking her away to somewhere secluded, just the two of us without any interruption from the real world: a place where we could be together – no one else, just Bella and me. I chewed at the inside of my mouth, smiling, and leaned back on my elbows, thinking of how she had looked sitting in the bathtub across from me in the hotel. Her hair had been pulled back, loose, dampened strands clung to her neck, no make-up – she was breathtaking. It had been her birthday, and I wished I had known ahead of time – I would have done something special for her. But that was the type of thing that wouldn't be divulged in our particular relationship. Even if I didn't know too much about her, I was sure Bella had a normal life - one that seemed to make her very happy. She was too confident and grounded not to have a good life, and I wouldn't ruin that for her. But I was too selfish to stay away from her.

A high-pitched voice calling my name from behind broke me from my thoughts.

"Aloha, Uncle Edward! Howzit?" he yelled.

I could hear the sand shifting as he ran closer, and I sat up and flung the football back over my head without turning around.

"Cool! Dis foa me?" Seth asked, falling to his knees beside me and tossing the football in the air a few times.

"Yup." I answered, brushing the sand from my arms and hands.

"Mahalo."

"`A `ole pilikia."

"You know it's my birthday pretty soon, yeah?" Seth grinned widely; his nose, cheeks, and big brown eyes scrunched up from the sun. I took off my Ray Bans and put them on him – they were a little too big for his small face and slid down his nose.

"Why do you think I'm here?" I snatched the football out of his hands as I jumped to my feet and jogged toward the water. When I turned I saw Alice sitting under the shade of a tree, Seth's backpack lying on the sand next to her. We waved to each other.

Seth clapped once, adjusted my sunglasses and held his hands out in front of him, waiting for me to throw the ball.

"I going be seven!" he announced proudly, catching the football in both arms with a dramatic grunt.

"Well, duh!" I teased. Seth giggled and threw the ball back to me. "How's school?"

He stuck his tongue out, screwing up his face as though he was in pain. "School is lame. Mr. Varner no know what he talkin' about. I no like math; I not goin' need um wen I grow up. Get calculatahs now."

"Is that so?" I yelled across the distance between us, throwing the ball back to him as I looked at Alice and chuckled. She rolled her eyes, shaking her head.

"Yeah. Tutu say I no know what _I _talkin' about. She say I need um to be smart. I plenny smart. I akamai." Seth pointed to his head with his index finger.

"Your grandmother is right, Seth. Study hard so you can be whatever you want to be when you grow up, okay?"

"Yeah, k-den, Uncle Edward. So, I like know if you can come to my party?"

I sighed and looked toward Alice. I expected him to ask, but I knew Jane wouldn't want me there and I really didn't want to disappoint him. The last time Jane and I spoke was about a year ago, and our conversation had ended in an argument. She had found out that I had been the one paying for Seth's tuition for Kamehameha – a private school, and that it hadn't been fully funded by the insurance settlement she'd received after Claire died. Alice had helped me with that small untruth. Jane had been under the assumption the settlement had been much larger. I was thankful she hadn't investigated every detail and had trusted Alice enough to help her. That incident had almost cost me my relationship with Seth. It would have been easy to have simply set up an account for him and walk away, but I couldn't do that. I needed to be in his life since I took his mother's… I also _wanted_ to be in his life. He was family.

Alice nodded as though to tell me I would be able to go to his party. She had a way of pacifying Jane. As physically small as she was, Alice's personality was that of a giant. She convinced Jane to set aside her opinions and hatred of me for Seth's sake.

"I wouldn't miss it for the world, buddy!" Cocking my arm back holding the football, I yelled, "Go long!"

Seth shouted, "Woohoo!" and ran about ten feet further as I threw the ball in a high arc. He didn't catch it but scrambled to pick it up from the sand as though he had; my sunglasses falling off of his face. He performed his version of a touchdown dance by reaching his arms straight above his head while shaking his knees.

I laughed and shook my head, clapping. "You're a pro!"

Seth and I threw the football back and forth for a little while longer before it was time for Alice to take him home. Seth talked about school, hesitantly sharing how he had gotten into trouble by throwing food at a girl. His reason was that she had given him a weird look. In a not so stern voice, I told him he always had to be nice to girls no matter what. Seth unwillingly assented with an exasperated 'fine'.

"Uncle Edward, my party dis Saturday, yeah?"

"I'll be there, don't worry."

Alice ran her hand through Seth's black hair, holding his backpack in the other. "You need a hair cut before your party, mister." She looked at me and reached her hand to my hair and tugged. "So do you." I swatted her hand away.

"Uncle Edward and me get um hair cut together, k-den, Aunty Alice?"

I shrugged. "We'll have to ask Tutu first," Alice said.

Seth pulled the ends of his hair up on top of his head. "I like um cut like Uncle Edward, 'kay?"

Alice guffawed… loudly. "Um, I think all you'll need to do is roll out of bed for that look, Seth."

"Hey! There's nothing wrong with my hair," I joked, running my hand through it. _Bella likes it._ "If Tutu says it's okay, you and I will go and get our hair cut together."

"K-den." Alice helped Seth slide his backpack up his arms. "You go see my Makuahine now?" he asked innocently.

Alice grimaced. "Yes." I paused. Even though I visited Seth only a few times a year, he remembered that I always went to Claire's grave after seeing him first. I had only gone with Seth once. I wasn't sure if he remembered her at all; he was so young when she died. Alice said it was a morbid tradition. "I'll lay some flowers for you too."

Seth wrapped his arms around my waist. "You know I get plenny aloha for you. Nice foa you to come see me again, Uncle Edward. Aloha."

***

That night I walked to a bar near my hotel where Alice and I were supposed to meet for dinner. I hated coming back to this place; not the bar – the island. Over the course of the past three years it hadn't gotten any easier. Seth was an exception.

I took a seat at the end of the bar. The bartender approached me and asked what I wanted to drink. I started off slowly and ordered a Fire Rock Pale Ale. It wasn't long before I finished the contents of the bottle and asked for another along with a shot of tequila.

After I had laid flowers on Claire's stone, I drove to the site of the crash. The latter was what Alice had really meant by it being a morbid tradition. Maybe it was, but I wanted to pay my respects to everyone who had died that day. The couple was from Washington State, some small town named Forks. I only knew their names: Tori and Riley Vetala.

I stared at the wood grain of the bar, thinking about how the island held a different kind reverence for me now… no, not reverence… it was derision. It was no longer a place of awe inspiring beauty, instead it was a cage made of impenetrable glass.

A loud laugh caught my attention, and I looked up, noticing a girl with chestnut brown hair that reached the middle of her back talking with a group of people. She had the same color hair as Bella. _Fuck_. I wished she had stayed with me one more night.

I ordered another shot and Fire Rock.

As I glanced toward the entrance, I saw Alice standing by the door looking around. The bar wasn't overly crowded, but there were enough people to have blocked her view of the bar. Considering she wasn't very tall anyway, it didn't take much. I ordered her a beer before standing and calling her name.

I wasn't in the mood to have dinner with her, let alone talk - unless it involved ordering a drink, but she was as persistent as only she could be.

I called Alice a couple of times per month to check on Seth. I had told her about Bella during one of our more recent conversations. She had asked - badgered was probably a more accurate description - why I had sounded so relaxed. It was after the weekend we had gone camping.

Alice and I made small talk for a few minutes as she looked over the menu. I wasn't hungry and ordered another beer.

"So, when are you going to tell her?" she asked over the noisy chatter. A group of people had gathered behind us and were laughing and talking loudly.

"Tell who what, Alice?"

"The girl you've been seeing. When are you going to admit how much you like her?"

I took a long pull from the bottle and shrugged. "Why do I have to say anything at all? And I have no problem admitting that I like her. I like her a lot; she's great." The bartender walked over to us and Alice asked for a Mahi-Mahi sandwich and fries. I asked for another shot. The bartender eyed me cautiously. "I'm walking tonight." He nodded and poured the tequila.

The crowd behind us got louder as a few more people joined the group. Someone, a guy, accidentally bumped into me and apologized. Alice asked if I wanted to move to a table; I said I was fine where we were.

"You're going to end up hurting yourself and her, Edward. You need to be honest and tell her what's going on with you."

"Nothing's going on with me, Alice. Bella and I are fine with how things are. Don't Ask, Don't Tell. You don't need to worry about it."

"Bullshit!" she yelled over the noise. "Look at you. You're not even here for an entire day and already you're getting drunk. Did you go there?"

"Yeah." Why did she ask? She knew I was going to the site. The same guy knocked into me again, this time it was hard enough that I jerked forward. I closed my eyes, annoyed, as he apologized. I didn't respond and took another drink of my beer.

"You deserve better than this, Edward. Jesus Christ, I don't understand why you torment yourself."

I abruptly turned toward Alice and leaned my arm on the back of the barstool. I appreciated everything she had done for Seth, but she really needed to mind her own business. It took a few seconds to focus on her face – the alcohol had finally started to take effect. "I-"

The asshole bumped into me… _again_ and spilled his drink on my arm. He immediately put his fat fucking hand on my shoulder and said how sorry he was as he laughed.

I slowly looked at his hand and then at his face. "Get your fucking hand off me." My teeth gritted as I took a deep, ragged breath.

"Ease up, man. It was an accident." The fat fuck rolled his eyes as he turned his back to me. "Pussy."

I stood quickly, the wooden legs of the barstool made a loud screeching sound from scraping against the floor as I pushed it aside. "What did you say motherfucker?"

"Edward, don't." Alice pulled at my arm. "Just ignore that asshole."

Fat Fuck turned around and looked at me square in the eye.

_Do it motherfucker. Take a swing._

"I said pussy, Pussy. And tell your little cunt to keep her damn mouth shut."

The bartender yelled something from the opposite end of the bar, and Fat Fuck cocked his head and smirked. I yanked my arm away from Alice with my fist clenched and hit the motherfucking Fat Fuck in his fat fucking face as hard as I fucking could. He fell backwards a few steps into the group of people.

It felt good.

As fast as the bartender tried to come between us - Alice and the women in his group shrieking at obnoxiously high pitches - Fat Fuck's fist slammed into my cheek.

The last thing I remembered was Alice dragging me out of the bar, telling me what a jerk I was.

***

The next morning I awoke to a pounding headache and a bruised cheek, and all I could think about was Bella.

I needed to see her but that wasn't possible. I missed her and I wanted to smell her hair and touch her silken skin, but I couldn't. I could have called her… or texted or emailed her, but I couldn't do that either. She'd hear it in my voice or read it in my words. My desperation for her would have been evident, and I didn't want to scare her. She had made it clear she didn't want more than what we had agreed upon, but if she ever did want more I wasn't sure I could do that either. In fact, I knew I couldn't. She deserved more, but again, I was selfish.

I missed her birthday and wanted to get her something. I drove to a jewelry store in Lahaina. When I saw the bracelet with the heart attached, I knew immediately it was perfect for her and imagined the heart – my heart - dangling from her delicate wrist.

A couple of days later while shopping for a gift for Seth's birthday, I spotted an armoire in the window of a furniture store. It was a chain store, so the chances of there being another one on the east coast was likely, and I could have this armoire delivered by the time I arrived back home. The design was so very Bella; it was perfect. For a moment I was concerned she might think I'd overstepped a boundary if I bought it for her. I hoped she'd just see it as a gesture to feel comfortable whenever she came to the lake house. The fact that she would have a permanent place in my home was a bonus. I couldn't wait to get back to her, but I couldn't let her see the bruise on my face.

I decided Alice was wrong. Bella didn't need to know anything.

***

Guess what? Voting opens tonight for the Indies. :) Reviews are lovely and translations are below. Thank you for reading!

K-den: Okay

Makuahine: Mother

Tutu: Grandmother

Kamehameha: A privately run school partially funded by the Bishop Estate. Apparently, it's an honor to be able to attend this school. There is also one on the main island.

Aloha: Hello, Goodbye, Love

Calculatahs: Calculators

Mahalo: Thank You

`A `ole pilikia: No problem (you're welcome)

Howzit: How are you

Akamai: Intelligent


End file.
